"Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it."
~ Bill Cosby ~
President Franklin Delano Roosevelt once famously made a speech in which he said, "The only thing we have to fear is, is fear itself." Well, with all due respect to the president, I don't buy it. Not at face value anyway.
The truth is, fear is real and is quite often legitimate. The fear of fire, jumping from a great height, or being vigilant against terrorism for example all make sense. We shouldn't allow that fear to paralyze us, of course, but should understand that it's designed to help keep us safe, when properly used.
But there is another kind of fear that we need to be aware of. It's something called irrational fear and, if we allow it to, it can be devastating to us. If we’re not careful, it can stall our success and sabotage our long term goals and desires.
Irrational fear is more often than not rooted in guilt, regret, or past failures. It's like a big anchor that's weighing you down, and it keeps you from ever becoming all that you can be in your life, or living the way you'd like to live.
In my own life, I've had my share of fears to overcome. Like the fear of failure, that I'm not good enough, or I couldn't make it. But, I've learned what it takes to face them down, and I’d like to share five simple steps you can use to do the same.
1) Switch off irrational thoughts by thinking logically.
When you’re in a fearful situation, the creative part of your brain takes over and conjures up all sorts of dire thoughts. It’s hard to think rationally in that state, so it’s vital that you switch back to the logical side. To do so, try this: recite your ABCs backward, or count as high as you can by threes, or name all of the seven dwarves. All of these methods force you back to the logical side of the brain, allowing you to think rationally.
2) Control your focus.
Whatever you focus on, you tend to bring more of into your life. Therefore it’s important to only focus on those things you want, not on what you don’t want. So, rather than focusing on how scared you are, instead focus on how it is going to feel when you overcome the fear, and on the steps involved to do so.
3) Assess the fear.
Is what you’re feeling real, or is it something that you’ve simply made up? As I mentioned earlier, there are some fears that are legitimate and we need to be aware of them, and respect them. However, it’s usually the ones that aren’t real—the ones that we simply make up—that hold us back the most in life. That’s why it’s so important to know the difference.
4) Respond according to your assessment.
Once you have made your assessment, act on the fear accordingly. Keep in mind that your response could change from situation to situation. Some fears (legitimate ones) you may avoid, others you may have to face. Also, be aware that just because you face a fear one time, that does not mean that it goes away forever.
5) Expect fear to pop up from time to time.
Fear should not catch you by surprise, especially if you’re pushing your limits. Knowing that it’s out there will keep you prepared, but also know that you can overcome it. You have the ability to control it and no fear is so great that it can stop you from moving forward.
So there you have it. Five simple steps that, if followed, will allow you to face down any fear and move forward in your life...No Matter What!
Well, that's it for now. Until next time...
Keep reaching,
Jay